- Alcohol kills.
- So what? Water makes you immortal?

Everybody has to think.
I think I'll drink one more beer!

-Why have you stopped at three kids?
-I heard that every 4th child born is Chinese.

A man was walking past a gravestone with the words:
"Here lies a lawyer, a man with a good heart, an honorable man"
- Good Lord! man cross himself. These guys have put three people in the same grave!